lately

it seems that every month i look up in the middle of it all and am suddenly alarmed by how quickly time has flown by. this month is no exception. i don't feel like i have been exceptionally busy, but there's always something to do and the constant pull of other things that i would rather be doing but don't have time for. i think this is normal...?

something about my research and grad school life of late doesn't feel right. in the midst of all the soul-crushing that is sort of understood to be a natural part of the phd process (see phd comics), i seem to have really misplaced my drive and passion for this stuff. so, instead of fighting off distractions and kicking my project into high gear the way that i should be doing, i'm dragging my feet and acquiescing to all of the random distractions and demands by my boss, which then become the excuses for why i'm not progressing as quickly as i could or should be. sometimes this feeling of "not caring" is liberating and translates directly into more free time, more sleep and a more balanced life, but other times i can't shake the feeling that something is really wrong, that i'm in the wrong field or that i've lost my way somehow. of course, this may also just be a natural part of the cycle, with the upswing looming ahead. i guess we'll see.

in the meantime, life has been really good. i've been working on a couple of pendants in jewelry class which are nearing completion. =) i also found a wedding dress at the brides against breast cancer event which was really fun and which i should really blog separately about. i have also started up running again, with plans to enter the NY marathon lottery. And just this past week, i finalized trips to seattle and austin (for ger's college visits) and to vegas (for jen a's 30th). lots of excitement coming up. =) 27 is just around the bend...